Because of you.

April 5th, 2007 at 12:38:42 AM

Have you any idea how much i miss you?
It's getting harder to write nowadays, each time i feel harder to breathe, each time i feel strangled in this place.
Waiting for you to come back, bestie.

And the wait's too long at times.

hah. Didn't went to school today. Read empress orchid till nearly 4. Ah wells, Depressing book. Downfall of china and all, it's odd how the heart seems to break. hmph. All chinese man's ego dropped. Been a long time since i updated. Well, i have nothing to update thats y. Lol. Satur out with ryn in queens then to the musical. I hope it will be good, or atleast i won't fall asleep halfway through it. Lol. Then, sunday to gurney. Addicted to fast tempo songs nowadays. Lol. Ah, mum's spaghetti was delicious. I feel depressed. T.T Ah wells, it's just a book. lol. but i gotta say, they mild off empress yehonala's vicious nature. I had always thought of her as cruel and cold. After all, she amputated a concubine's hands and legs and left her to rot in a jar. If that's not vicious, then i don't know what is. LOL. China history's very interesting. Bought a few books on it. But i still don't dare to bring myself into reading it. Too depressing later, reading the downfall of dynasties. Hahah. I like reading bout chien long and kang hsi though. Peaceful moments ma. Hahaha. Lawak gila.

Stomach ache gila. ~ ; S Depressing. Period pain smore. AIYER. Don't like la. And my tooth is hurting for i don't know what reason.

Months ago, i told myself to be stoic. Months ago, i stopped letting guys determine my happiness. Months ago, i decided to live for myself and crush their ego by doing what I want whenever I want. Months ago, i turned into someone desperate to be freed from the fist of a relationship.

Now? I am smilling. I am great. And i still live by those words.

I lost RM50 today.

March 26th, 2007 at 01:00:25 AM

=.= . It's okay. I shall just assume i didn't go to school for a week and sleep in my paradise of music.

Mar's hand is so chunted man. I can't stop staring. The wound's like bak kua only. LOL. Yea i wanted to tell you ppl bout her hand. She was dragged by the tali during tarik tali finals in sports day. A fat girl then fell on her. Whoo. Semangat blue house captain begitu dahsyat la. Lol. She's always busy & well, busy really.

Caught with flu. I blame it on Kath man. LOL. Too bad, buddy.

Ah, i lost 50bux did i mention? Lol. That's like ~damn. LOL.
But i have 500bux so i should sit and be thankful. T.T Yes, i should. Enough bout the 50 bux *hits myself*. That's so girly of me. Hovering over a matter which won't change. Typical girls do that. And oh thank the Lord, but no thanks...i don't want to be no typical girl. The sensitive, emotional shit. May i add, overly sensitive, emotional shit. Haha. Yea, i love condemning the human race. So sue me. xP

What's

March 18th, 2007 at 11:46:34 PM

hard to deal with?

Perhaps i could open up the book of Karma again and see the list of things i have done wrong, haven't done but would be wrong if i do. I cry, for i would implode if i don't. But the cry-afters, i become solid again.

don't speak. don't laugh. don't smile. you might be mistaken. just be still.
still.
still.
still.
now that's perfect.