Cold.

February 10th, 2007 at 06:29:15 AM

[ e m o t i o n s & p e r s o n a l i t y ]

1 Feeling Blue: sadness & grief
when you last cried?: Forget already.
where you last cried?: room
why you last cried?: "I am waiting for her to come back" xD
do you cry spontaneously?: nop
cry every day?: nop
saddest memory you keep?: got lar.
saddest thought you can think?: broken family
saddest movie you've seen?: Gladiator
saddest person you've met?: yasmin
the saddest you ever been?: two years back.
what's the reason?: break up.
ever sad for no reason?: lol. NO
what do you do when you're sad?: sleep/listen to music/laugh.
who or what do you go to for comfort?: read,watch tv, music, piano, friends.
ever lost the will to live?: yes.
how does death affect you?: don't give a damn.
did anyone close to you ever die?: yeah.
know anyone who died before growing up?: yes.
does time truly heal everything?: time fades the hurt, not heal.
worst day of your life?: lol.

2 On Top of The World: happiness & hope
last time you smiled?: just now.
last time you laughed?: yday.
person or thing who can always make you laugh?: friends, tv, books,thoughts.
person or thing that can always make you smile?: same like the above
person or thing who cheers you up when you're down?: soon ee. lol. sheril,kath,wen.
happiest person you've ever seen?: sandra.
song to listen to when you're happy?: imma shine
feel good movie?: harry potter&lotr. XD
ever cried out of happiness?: yes
cried because you laughed so hard?:duhhhhh
place to be that makes you happy?: taiwan. room. anywhere with friends.
ever been happy for no reason?: yea.
what do you think it means to be truly happy?: when you feel like you can fly
best day of your life?: may24th and each time i stay over wen's place.
what are your hopes for yourself?: a lot.
what are your hopes for others?: a perfect bf for sheril and wen, a guy for leen and shern,money&happiness for parents, wake up call for bro.
do you feel you're living a good life?: yea. i have everyTHING i want..
what does it mean to you to live a good life?: sufficient money to live through
3 Seeing Red: anger and hate
the last time you were angry?: no idea
who were you angry with?: the world.
what do you dislike about yourself?: almost everything
what quality in a person do you most dislike?: cocky,wannabe, anti-gay, i-m-right-u-r-wrong.thats-that.
what little things make you angry or annoyed?: a lot
where do you go when you're angry and need to get away?: nowhere.
what do you take out your anger on?: i either do nothing/keep quiet or rant to my frens
how often are you angry?: often. xD
too much?: yes, at times.

4 Don't make a peep: insecurites & shyness
are you uncomfortable around new people?: depends..if they're clickable or not
what intimidates you?: nothing. snakes? lol
how long does it take for you to put your trust in someone?: years.
what are your insecurities?: touch.
do you think you will ever get over them?: nope
how?: -
how much will you open up to people?: depending on who's the ppl
do you share more with your friends or your family?: friends.
what is your reason for it?: they listen
who do you trust most?: leen,sheril,wen,shern

5 Green with Envy: jealousy
what quality about yourself do you wish you had but do not?: humility&silence
what material possession do you wish you could have?: right now, a hp
do you wish you lead someone else's life?: hell no.
anyone in particular?: God.xD
do you know of anyone ever being jealous of something you have?: yea.

6 In The Eye Of The Beholder: beauty
is beauty in the eye of the beholder?: yes
are there things you find to be beautiful but no one else does?: yup
what's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?: ocean
can you find beauty in everything?: it depends.
what is beauty, really? getting pretty deep eh?: its all bout perspectives. it varies. beauty's emotional to me.

7 Forgive and Forget: forgiveness and apology
can everything be truly forgiven?: duh no
if not, what type of things cannot?: curang, unexpected hurt, backstabbing, insincere gestures, and lots more
do you forgive people easily?: nop
have you ever forgiven someone for something and it turned out to be a mistake?: nop
do you forgive and forget?:yes, i move on.
or forgive but not forget?: no
or neither?: lol.

8 Cowardly Lion: fear and bravery
what do you fear most?: being thrown into a bugs pit
do you harbour any of the common fears
such as.........
[]aichmophobia-fear of needles
[x]altophobia-fear of heights
[]arachnophobia- fear of spiders
[]arsonphobia-fear of fire
[]atychiphobia-fear of failure
[]autophobia-fear of being alone
[]musophobia-fear of mice
[]necrophobia-fear of death
[x]ophidiophobia-fear of snakes ?:
do you know why?: no
when have you been the most afraid?: nothing.
what is the bravest thing you have ever done?: stand up for what i believe in?

9 Colour Outside The Lines: imagination & creativity
how do you express yourself?: i dont.
do you think individuality is important?: yes.
do you daydream often?: nop.
what's your favorite color?: blue.
do you know why?: its beautiful

10 The More, The Merrier: friendship & family
do friends come first in your life?: 40%
does family come first in your life?: 60%
are you close to your family?: yes
are you close to your friends?: yes
do you have a best friend?: yes
are you their best friend in return?: yes
have you ever had a friendship fade away?: yes
have you ever had a friendship break away?: yea
is there anything you will not share with your friends?: yes.
is there anything you will not share with your family?: yes
who do you share more with?: friends.

11 Head over Heels: love
do you believe love exists?: yes
why or why not?: we are originally made outta love
do you believe in love at first sight?: yes
what do you think it means to love someone?: to let him go.
do you believe there is more than one way to love someone?: yes
do you feel loved?: yea
ever loved someone?: yes
ever been in love?: yes
have you ever said, "I love you" to someone and meant it?: yes
have you ever said, "I love you" to someone and did not mean it?: yes
what is your opinion on society's idea of love today?: grand and hyperbole words/actions.
how do you think a person knows when they're in love?: hahaha.
do you think you'll find love?: no.
do you think you've already found it?: lol.
what does it feel like?: shit.

12: The End.......
Have you thought about certain people while taking this survey?: nop
Or certain memories?: nop
Have your emotions changed during this survey?: nop

* * * *

Relationships scare the sh*t outta me

February 7th, 2007 at 06:00:01 AM

at times. It's posessive, jealousy, controlling side and paranoid bubbling temper is wayyyy too freaky to even begin with. I mean yea, i was in a relationship for a year plus and practically loved him with my entire freaking heart. Oh, don't ask me how i did that. I doubt i would want a relationship that lasts for a year plus now. The prospects are scary, not the guy. I am afraid i will get all jealous when he talks to other girls, when other girls give him friendly gifts and etc. Fuh. Tak boleh Tak boleh nie....

I am sorry i can't be perfect. But must i be sorry each time?

I stand up for what i think is right. And if i had hurt you in the process of doing that, i am sorry i am not sorry. There's nothing i can do really. If i were all gushed up bout feeling bad and apologizing, it wouldn't be a sincere one anyway. So, i give you this hesitant smile of mine. Take it, or leave it. Everybody's different after all. Sorry we are that way. But am i really genuinely feeling so?

; )

Some things burn on earth. Others replenish themselves in hell. Maybe my dreams are of one of them.

Cold.

I promise...

Relationships scare the sh*t outta me